Nicaraguan Culinary Adventure Recap and Closing Poem


Words cannot describe what I experienced over the past week. However, I will do my best to recount the experience through pictures and a poem.

I had the opportunity to meet many new friends and we all explored Nicaragua together. I worked on a poem throughout the week and read it to the group before dinner on the final night. While you may not understand all that is said, I think you’ll get the gist of it and I’ll use pictures to help.

On a few occasions, one of them during a morning yoga session, a truck drove by outside of the gate to our property. It was a produce truck with a guy on a loud speaker with the craziest sounding monotone voice you’ve ever heard. One of the phrases he called out was, “Platanos maduros, manzanas y cebollas.” That means “ripe bananas, apples and onions”.

I call this poem: “Platanos Maduros, Manzanas y Cebollas”

We all met in Nicaragua for the very first time,

So to recount the experience, I’ve constructed this rhyme.

We loaded into the van and threw our luggage up top,

Then cruised through this “third world” as if we were rolling to a stop.

Eventually we got here though the hills were pretty steep.

I knew this place was legit when they had a Land Cruiser and not a Jeep.

We didn’t know what we were in for, but took the chance, said, “What the heck?”

What sealed the deal for me was the view from the deck.

We met Mark and Marielle and their dogs, Hustle and Flow,

There was Flora the Yoga queen and her endurance athlete, Bartolo.

The food has been the focus at the Buena Vista Surf Club,

On Wednesday we all tried my Super Radical Rib Rub.

We had a cop from Montreal introduce us to the werewolf game,

And a few in this crowd with confusing names.

Like the guy from Britain, is he Jordan or is he Jay?

One thing we know for sure is that his friend is gay.

Justin from the start was named Papichulo,

On this trip, his tan and his thirst for “hanging ten” surely did grow.

From Wyoming we’ve got three names in one, Jessica, Jessie, Jess,

It would be hard to argue that, among people, her and Kirk are not the best.

Kirk showed us his skills on the barbell and the board,

When he gave me a gift on the plane, I surely was floored.

We’ve got the Cuban and the Northerner who to me are the perfect couple,

If we needed help counting beans, they’d be there on the double.

Lewis wore his buff and for him regulating heat is hard.

In Mary’s fictitious game, he always pulled the werewolf card.

Marilyn is quite the gal with her eyes and her smile,

If she were to recount to you all she knows, you’d be here for quite a while.

Let’s not forget about the food, let’s give thanks we didn’t eat haggis,

Then let’s continue this rhyme with three firefighters from Vegas.

We’ve got Javier, or is it Mike? He’s bald and his abs are real,

Screw the Zone diet, this guy eats twenty blocks per meal!

We’ve got dilly dally Dale whose last name, though spelt funny, is Spieker,

He traded his surf board for the boogie type, but that only made him weaker.

I’m glad that he brought his friends on this adventure at this place,

And showed us how after a few drinks he puts on his “perma-happy” face. 

We’ve got Mark with the mustache, the waves he can surely ride,

While you might think it’s luck that helps him, it’s really the octopus on his side.

Then there’s Jesse and Gina, the white boy and the local,

Their reason for this trip is to focus on the focal.

Gina’s got her surfing skills and her eyelashes that she bats,

To set our group up in style, she brought a package of Flash Tats.

Jesse brought some camera gear, there’s no doubt about that.

He’ll recount this Culinary Adventure in the motion picture format.

We’ve got the Sicilian from Ohio, she’s the youngest, she’s a noob.

Will you all join me in forgiving her for not covering her boobs?

Is Casselli with a C or K? Is that even her last name?

Either way, I’m glad she’s here making the adventurous live her game.

We’ve got Eddie and Michelle, the uptight couple from L.A.

If I were to ask you if that description were accurate, you’d have to say “No Way!”

Michelle likes to drink, but she’s, “not an alcoholic”.

If she had it her way, she’d ditch Ed and with the animals she’d frolic.

Eddie Money lost some money in the form of two hundred dollars,

But the incident didn’t even make him blink, do you know why? This guy’s a baller!

Glenda! is from New Hampshire, her occupation is a dentist.

She helped me shop and cook, her Nicaraguan job is my apprentice.

She crushes it with the barbell and kills it with her smile,

To learn a thing or two, she walked in my sandals for a mile.

The kitchen was hot no doubt and the cooler space was few,

I’d like to take this opportunity to sincerely say, “Thank You!”

The thanks are not for Glenda alone, I appreciate everyone in this room.

You’ve helped me make my life a dream, but the close to our time together is coming soon.

So how do we finish up this trip? How do we close out our time?

To start with, I suppose I’d better finish up this rhyme.

Eating properly is important, but I’m not afraid to share some chips,

With people who I’ve never met in an effort to build relationships.

The thing about our existence is that we all face stormy weather,

The key to life is understanding that we are all in this boat together.

So thank you, thank you, and thank you. I consider you all my friends.

Meeting at this place is only where our journey begins…

There are big ships and small ships and ships that sail the seas,

But the best ships are friendships, I hope you all agree!

“Keep It Paleo!” my friends. “Keep It Paleo!”

The trip consisted of so many memories. Some of the activities we partook in included:

  • Ziplining through the jungle canopy.
  • Horseback riding along the beach at sunset.
  • Deep sea fishing for Black Tuna and Mahi Mahi.
  • Surf, swimming, slack lining and boogie boarding.
  • Early morning Yoga with Flora the Namaste queen!
  • Some of us rented motorcycles and explored the beaches north and south of Playa Madera.
  • Beach workouts with our killer Central American Barbell.

I could go on and on about how much fun we had, but I won’t. It was my plan to do a full on review of the Buena Vista Surf Club, the beach and the surrounding area, but I don’t think anyone is going to give up their spot for next year, so promoting is not necessary ;). We did our best to capture the experience on video and I will post that when the edit is complete. We may have an opening for a few more spots next year, so stay tuned to the site for future booking opportunities.


In the end, friendships were forged and our sense of adventure was fed. While I don’t know what the future has in store, it would be a dream to hold this Culinary Adventure on my birthday each year. That means I’ve got 358 days to go. I think I’ll start packing…

“Keep It Paleo!” my friends.

Your Pal,

Paleo Nick

(seen here with my gal, Pidi)

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